Sunday, October 23, 2011

Being hard on myself

So I miss counted... I thought I completed my 30 post goal...but I didn't. only 25. yikes. Must have counted a screen of the blogs twice.

So yesterday you didn't see a blog because a) I thought my goal was up and b) I didn't write one.

but I am not going to be hard on myself. I have done that for way too long. I am just going to pick up where I left off and complete the goal. no big deal. I am getting better at that really. Better at not beating myself up and being hard on myself.

For so long...and probably as long as I can remember... I felt like I had to be the strong one. By 'strong', I don't mean tough or mean. I mean solid...constant...steady. If I faltered even the slightest bit on anything I would literally beat myself up. wow...thinking back...this in and of itself is one of the biggest reasons I suffered from depression.

Over the past several months I have learned that it is okay for me not to be strong. It is okay to show my weaknesses. That is a huge aspect of being vulnerable. Being open. Being honest.

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