I have always said that one of the greatest needs in life is to be fully known and fully loved at the same time. Can you even imagine? Someone knowing all of your secrets (yes..even the dirty ones) and still loving you no matter what. Makes me a little nervous to even talk about it. I immediatly start biting my lip and talking out of the side of my mouth when I say it.
To be fully known AND fully loved.
It is hard and it is tricky. The bad part? It is SO cut and dry. For example... in theory it sounds good right? But how is it possible? In one brief instance in order to share your life (by 'life' I mean experiences, trials, accomplishments, etc.)with someone...you would have to give them all the great and gory details? It may be possible for some of you, but not this kid.
Scares me to death to even think about it.
But being scared is part of the process. This process or journey I am going through has a lot of steps to it. I have started to share my experiences with others (jason, counselor, friends, etc), started blogging again, started feeling again (slowly but surely).
I still want to 'be fully known and fully loved"...that hasn't gone away...but it doesn't come at the snap of a finger. It comes along with the process. As people "know more...they can love more".
Whether or not they choose to love me more due to the information they are given is their choice...I can't help that.
But this is my journey in life. And I can't wait for you to know more...and in return...to love more.
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2 comments:
I enjoyed reading this post from you, Danael. I share many of your fears about being "known" and because of these fears, perhaps will not be fully "loved." I admire your ability to put such real and heartfelt truths out there.
Much love,
a
Thank you Amber.
Scary huh?
But the great thing about it? Being loved by people who know more feels SO good. :)
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